The Dos and Don’ts of Conversing with “Harry Potter” Fans

About a month ago, J.K. Rowling released new writing on Pottermore titled “Ilvermorny School of Witchcraft and Wizardry,” which explored the origin of the seventeenth-century North American school of magic that featured diverse characters and a different set of sorting houses. Come on now, you remember—this was prior to the “Pokemon Go” craze that has caused various people to discover dead bodies, be lured into robberies and cause car crashes all to capture little monsters in virtual reality.

To commemorate Pottermore’s trending that was sort of swept under the rug, in addition to my desperate desire to visit The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios, this piece chronicles the dos and don’ts of conversing with Harry Potter fans.

Do agree that Albus Severus is a ridiculous name for a child

I mean, a generic name like Tom or Bob would have sufficed. Oh, wait—nevermind on the Tom. Awkward.

Don’t mention movie Ginny and her lack of development

Do not bring this up, ever. We do not discuss the fact that chemistry was more palpable between Dobby and Harry’s sock than movie Ginny and movie Harry.

Do pretend the death of Fred Weasley never occurred

Nope, this never occurred. It was but a mere dream. Goodbye.

Don’t call it a children’s series

Um, excuse me but the series got darker—both in story-telling and the production itself—and more complex as Harry and friends got older, so.

Do acknowledge that Snape wasn’t that great of a character

Yeah, yeah, yeah, he was hopelessly and irrevocably in love with Lily. That doesn’t necessarily negate the way he treated Harry as he was growing up. He’s a kid, dude—why is he paying for the way his father treated you?

Don’t remind fans that their acceptance letters aren’t ever arriving

Do not remind them that they are 24 and have aged out of the acceptance letter window. They don’t typically bode very well to that ugly reminder.

Do remember SPEW in all its gloriousness

Originally called “Stop the Outrageous Abuse of Our Fellow Magical Creatures and Campaign for a Change in Their Legal Status,” but due to its inability to fit on a button, it resulted in the alternative “Society for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare”—an organization advocating for justice for house elves. Stay woke, Hermione. Stay woke.

Don’t call the ABC Family (now Freeform) marathons excessive

Whether it’s Thanksgiving, Christmas, Halloween, Whack-A-Mole Day, National Ice Cream Day—a Harry Potter marathon will always be relevant. ABC Family gets it.

Don’t use Cedric Diggory and Edward Cullen interchangeably

You will most likely get your hair ripped out were you to ever blur the fictional realms of Stephenie Meyer and J.K. Rowling.

Do acknowledge that Malfoy was never the antagonist

Poor, misguided little Malfoy—a lost soul born into unfortunate blood lines and circumstances, faced with choices that weren’t exactly his to make. While he had his flaws, he was never quite the antagonist as depicted in the introductory installment of “Sorcerer’s Stone.”

What are your thoughts on the new Ilvermorny story? Most importantly, which house were you sorted into? Share with us using the hashtag #CampusCropChat on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, and be sure to follow us on Snapchat @ASICPP.